Portobello Pizza....nom, nom, nom....

I found this recipe on the Vegetarian Times website and tweeked it a bit. I'm typically a bread slore, but decided to give this recipe a go. Pardon any grammatical errors...food coma.

Ingredients:

4-5 portobello mushrooms
2-3 scallions
1/2 red bell pepper
kalamata olives
fresh spinach
pesto
mozzarella or mozzarella substitute
oregano

Directions:

Clean the mushrooms for obvious reasons. Then cut the stems off the caps, chop the stems and place in a bowl. Chop scallions, red bell pepper, and kalamata olives - mix in same bowl with the mushroom stems. Preheat oven at 400 degrees. Place mushrooms caps gill side up on a baking sheet and spoon pesto on said mushroom caps. Arrange fresh spinach, mixture, mozzarella, mixture, then mozzarella (Yes, in that order. Just do it!). Sprinkle oregano on top and bake for about 15 minutes or until the mozzarella is melted.

Here is a visual aid:

Nom, nom, nom.....
SAFETY TIP: Don't burn yourself.

"Gangsta Style" Pasta Sauce

Yeah, you can buy pasta sauce out of a jar, but that's not the point. Its more convenient to get jar pasta, but not as good as home made. My boyfriend showed me how to make this "gangsta style" and its not that difficult to prepare. On a side note, this sauce freezes really well.

WARNING: If you don't like cooking how you feel, then this isn't the recipe for you. And don't burn yourself.

Ingredients:

2-3 Roma tomatoes
2-3 small cans of tomato paste
1 bottle of red wine (anything but merlot)
garlic
onion or shallots
sugar
oregano
basil (optional)
salt
pepper
olive oil
water

Directions:

Step 1: Pour a glass of wine and take a sip. Then heat some olive oil in a large pan and add the cans of tomato paste. As the tomato paste is heating up, finish your glass of wine and slice roma tomatoes. Place roma tomatoes and minced garlic into pan with tomato paste. Like so:

Pour another glass of wine and take a sip. After you have a fairly good buzz, start mincing some onion or shallots and add to pan. Let everything cook for about 15 min. enough to finish your second galss of wine(also make sure it doesn't burn). After you're done with your glass, take a masher and start mashing the crap out of the tomatoes. Mash them good, don't be a pansy! No more wine for you! Pour about a cup in the pan to start with.

Add a little bit more wine and a little water. Then sprinkle in some sugar, stir, sprinkle some more. This is the point where the tomfoolery is out of my hands and its all you. Add salt, pepper, oregano to taste. Keep stiring...adding wine, water, and spices to suit your taste buds. Pour on your favorite pasta or use it to make lasagna.

GLUTEN FREE TIP: Ancient Harvest Quinoa Pasta is excellent!